20.03.2069

I spoke with a friend from Gin Corp today. Maugosha is a B2B Social Media Marketing specialist in the sales department for Cambodia and a close friend of mine, with long brown hair and eyes. Her smile makes me joyfully fill out every invoice she lays on my desk, handing them to me, holding them first in her delicate hands with red, alluring nails, while standing on those long, well-toned legs and thighs. Sometimes I wonder if she moonlights for her branded bags on blue websites. I'm too shy to ask. I'll look it up. Maybe she has a link somewhere. OH GOD, IF ONLY SHE WERE WITH ME. She recently appreciated my Sioor Sausage perfume, now I use it every day, even before bed.

Rumors have it that files containing a virus were sent to the computers of top executives at Travelers Corporation, which, when clicked, filled the hard drive with files, turned the system sounds to maximum, and blocked the ability to turn off the device.

Travelers have always been different. They're typical corporate rats whose job is to be a sales rep for the Great Distillery. They distribute Gin worldwide and spend all day on calls with potential collabs. Their company cars have transatlantic capabilities, allowing them to travel at speeds close to the speed of light. Thanks to them, we owe Gin on every store shelf and at every degenerate party. The upside is that they love Karen Yeezowski's music the most, which they get on bootleg cassettes. They read a lot of motivational and business books. They are workaholics.

Gin Corp. always needed salespeople, so they took the best-trained cashiers from the bakery in Racoonopolis and turned them into real representatives. To become one of them, you have to go through a series of trainings from Gin Corp. and be interested in traveling, working with people, Starbucks coffee, new experiences, a young energetic team, and have angelic patience with low-ticket people and it'll be great.

Maugosha recounted in the company kitchen, during the hour-long coffee break shared by 50 employees, that she entered one day to ask the local IT guy for help fixing the printer, and returned without her jacket, though I'm sure she had it on today. She never leaves anything behind. Why is it that whenever a woman goes to fix a printer in the corporation, it turns into sex, considering that the IT guy is a handsome Spaniard with huge bumpers? I've always known that Maugosha had a crush on Juan, but I tried not to pay attention to it. Maybe someday she'll appreciate all the chocolates, flowers, and spam messages to make sure everything's okay with her. She told me herself that she's not into fuckboys.

When she crossed the threshold of the green office with a food hall, ping pong tables, and colorful bean bags for chilling, full of joy from working in white cubicles with blue fluorescent lights, where 40-year-old Raccoons spend their days typing on computers with a printer to the right of the monitor and a family photo 15 centimeters from its left edge, she saw the ubiquitous chaos and disorder.

Many of the employees had already reconciled themselves to the loss of their positions. Except for those best, tireless, undistracted by external factors, focused and striving to work in community and unity to complete all assigned tasks with the highest quality — only they were not afraid of changing jobs back outside of Gin Corp.

When I found out what the contents of the file were, laughter destroyed me internally. The amount of absurdity that poured out of it was worse than the last flood that hit Raccoonpolis 100 years ago and flooded half of the neighboring district and my great-grandfather's favorite bakery. It turned out that the file they opened was a typical Phishing Mail Scam with a file named "underage_anime_girls.exe." HOW ON EARTH CAN YOU OPEN SOMETHING LIKE THAT, HAVING A FAMILY? XDDD Anyway, only those who withstood the pressure of the environment, FOMO, and internal sexual arousal remained, which resulted in only strong individuals adapted to the corporate grind. I once read studies that one weak person in the whole team lowers its efficiency by up to 30%. Maybe this will introduce some revolution in the taste of Gin and make it even better, although I have nothing to complain about anyway.